A lot has been going on recently. My life feels like it is falling apart. School is not getting harder, but I just lack any drive to do anything. I'm scared of my friends, because I'm scared they judge me. I'm scared the world judges me. But then, I lack any drive to do anything other then what I have always been doing.
One of my Christmas wishes is for a shopping cart to use during school. I think everyone should have one.
Another one I know is coming true. I'm freaking finally taking drivers ed. It only took...over a year. I mean, I can understand where my mom was coming from by how she withheld me from it, because we moved here and things. But then her only excuse was...I actually don't know. But I'm taking it, and soon I don't have to rely on others for rides. But I have to sacrifice the currently play, which I did want to be in. But I get to be in the next play at least, the one acts, and I want those more then anything else.
Umm...I just sighed. I don't know what else to write, even though there is a plethora of things going on that I should get out, but I don't know how to even conjur them up into words. It's all abstract ideas and feelings. My head feels like it's going to explode again, which means another long story is going to be produced again. Hopefully it doesn't follow with another fight with depression. I'm still waiting too, hahaha. Always going to be waiting.
So, anyways, Christmas. My favorite season. My family doesn't really understand the idea behind it, or all the crap it brings because they just haven't grown up with it. They never had a childhood, or even time to be a teenager, so I understand how they don't understand the value in things like vacation or play or even holidays. I like Christmas though because it's so festive and people tend to be happy. The stories and connotations behind it too: they are the best. There are the deep and sad stories and the happy and jolly ones. I like the music, all the cheese and nappy ones even, and the colours and clothes. It's just such a happy season.
Some things I cannot stand though are: How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Rudolf the Red-Nosed Raindeer, Shrek the Halls, etc. I like Chairlie Brown, and that is it. I absolutly am disgusted with all the rest. I don't know why either hahaha.
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